HEALTHY — & WITHOUT CARE
Seeing the whole picture
I was walking home from enjoying a beer on a Sunday night and stopped to speak with the door staff of a certain premises just down the road from my home.
“I’m short of a man tomorrow. Can you work?” one of the door staff said to me.
“Sure, I can work,” I said, but with good reason suspicious at the inquiry.
“You’ll need to wear a collar and tie,” he said. “Don’t let me down now. Be here at 11pm tomorrow.”
Okay. I thought about his words and in particular about the barely concealed snide attitude I detected behind them. The next evening I put on collar and tie and, a little against my better judgement, turned up at the said premises at 10:50pm.
“You said to be here at 11pm in collar and tie, so here I am,” I reported.
Mr Snide started to laugh and considered the correct response was to reply “I’m not short of a man. I was only joking.”
Fine. I’m not. Another time, another place, another day I might have pulled a .38 special from a holster and there and then ended his uttely miserable existence. Games?
Having worked security opposite the Wang Centre in Boston I know something about these things. Check out the history of the place—it is the only bar/restautant/pizza hut imediately opposite the Wang Centre. It is my considered opinion that Mr Snide would soil himself if called upon to work there, for he would be working alongside professional people.
Now none of this has anything particular to do with disability, but it has everything to do with it.
I used to be fit and able, participating in sports, walking over mountain ranges with a back pack probably as heavy as Mr Snide himself on my shoulders, going to the gym every week for a gruelling but enjoyable two hours or more of badminton. I was a member of a cricket team, two snooker club teams and in my past had played for the under-England 21 rugby team against visiting and taken part in the under-England 21 national athletics finals in Leeds in 1966. I used to work as a professional journalist, still do, but not for a regular employer.
I was injured in differing accidents and also struck by some debilitating illnesses and as a result now live off a disability allowance Not that I can’t or won’t work—I would happily apply myself to a job at which I considered I might provide a useful service and one within my experience and capability. At present I work as an independent news webmaster and Newsmedianews.com is my own creation
I have detected here in Ireland a fairly widespread presence of ignorance towards people with a disability. If you are not confined to a wheelchair and displaying all the stereotypical image of the disabled person, you will encounter those who are ignorant and disrespectful enough to scorn your situation. This is exacerbated when the ignorant individual has the tendency of a bully.
Various groups within Ireland and within the Irish political parties have also detected this ignorance, which lends itself towards a form of discrimination.
Now, bullies. I know something about them too, namely that a swift and very painful kick where it hurts most is a sure way of putting them in their place. It works, but I have to say that I consider that quite insufficient in that it does not address the underlying motive in the bully being a bully to begin.
Those who have not experienced the frustration and reality of a disability can only understand its phenomenon through conscientious education. Yet even with the benefit of such education, those whose lives are self-centred will benefit little from it.
The advent of the relatively new-found wealth in Ireland, given the umbrella of the Celtic Tiger, has done little to detract from the prevalence of self-centred thinking. Instead it has had the tendency to propel young people deeper into the trough of self-centred lifestyles.
There can be no criticism of living to your own self-satisfaction. However, where such a lifestyle ignores and wilfully dismisses the reality of other people’s real life situations, criticism is both due and necessary.
It is also a problem that requires careful deliberation in its address and one in which antagonising the quarry or target can also lead to an escalation of the problem.
First and foremost however is the necessity for a willingness to recognise that the problem exists at all. Doing otherwise is being both disrespectful to and ignoring the reality of those who experience such circumstances.
care
Which brings it all down to a matter of care. It can be hugely difficult to interact with people who don't know how to care. To reciprocate in any meaningful way, such people must first be honest enough to acknowledge their shortcomings. Only then can they grow.
Where such honesty or willingness is absent, they must be led into situations wherein they can through personal experience understand not only their own predicaments, but also the predicaments of others.
I am just one of such people albeit one who is in a position to draw a little publicity to it.
See also report on workplace bullies
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