Aunty Grone's Menu Masterpieces

Welcome to Aunty Grone's famous recipes for life.
Aunty Grone's Culinary Menu Masterpieces are a delight to the heart. Simple to the core, they offer a sense of exquisite excellence to the bored connoisseur of rare foods.

Click recipe titles to view.

Noodle Poodle                           Ridiculous sandwich suggestions
Shrido Sandwich
Poodle d'houvres
Cheesy Noodle Dog Cum
Bischistosity Delight

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Astonish the waiting staff — order Noodle Poodle

Noodle Poodle
Ingredients
Chicken flavoured Noodles
Stick of Black Pudding
Szechuan chilli sauce
Oriental vegetables
Peppers
Garlic, onions, mushrooms
Bailey's creme
Whisky

Method
Partially cook vegetables and drain. Pulverise mushrooms.

Slice black pudding and mix with Szechuan sauce and pulverised mushrooms in frying pan and place on gentle heat for a few minutes.

Gradually add vegetables and chopped garlic and onion. Heat for several minutes more. Cook noodles, drain and soak with tumbler of whisky. Add 4 capfuls of Bailey's creme to frying pan and turn up heat for three minutes. Serve.

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Surprise your social worker with a Shrido Sandwich

Shrido Sandwich
Ingredients
Loaf of bread
Butter/margarine
Jar of Marmalade

Note: the Shrido Sandwich was invented in Shropshire and was an accepted ingredient to outdoor survival emergency foods used by the British army. Do not eat for longer than two years without any other intake of nourishment.

Method
Dry fry a slice of bread in a little butter or margarine.
Thickly butter two slices of bread, laying a coat of marmalade on one.

Place the fried bread onto the marmalade and spread another coat of marmalade over the fried bread.

Cover with remaining slice of buttered bread and serve. Non-marmalade users can use apricot jam.

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Simply Traditional ...

Poodle d'houvre
Ingredients
Wok ready Noodles
Tablespoon of rice

Stick of Black Pudding
bottle Szechuan chilli sauce
tin carrots
2 cooked potatoes
tin beans

Tip:
To change into delicious Sweet & Sour Poodle simply change the Szechuan chilli sauce for sweet & sour sauce.

Method

Put rice and noodles to cook.

Slice black pudding and mix with Szechuan sauce, carrots, potatoes and beans in small pan and place on gentle heat for 15 minutes, stirring continuously.

Dump on plate and serve. Delicious with pancakes.

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Treat your friends to Cheesy Noodle Dog Cum
not for the Féint of heart
Cheesy Noodle Dog Cum
Ingredients
Wok ready Noodles
3 oz milk

fresh cucumber
2 hot dog sausages
3 oz cheese

Method

Put noodles to cook.

Slice cucumber. Grate cheese and mix with milk and a little water and place on medium to high heat, stirring often.

Add hot dog sausages to cooking noodles and heat for several minutes. Drain and place on plate. Pour melted cheese over and add cucumber slices. Serve with spoon.

 

Bischistosity Delight — the perfect dessert
Bischistosity Delight
Ingredients
One medium sized boiler onion
One pack McVites Rich Tea biscuits

Method

Slice onion in half. Using a sharp knife slice off a 50mm thick ring of onion. Lay the onion flat between two upsisde down rich tea biscuits and serve. Lemon custard optional.

This tasty snack and dessert can be refreshingly embellished with Aunty Grone's Unique Toad Giblet Topping.
Due to legal difficulties arising from the preparation of Toad Giblet Topping we are unable to print the method here. You can obtain the method by email from Aunty Grone.

Ridiculous sandwich suggestions
marmalade & lettuce
beetroot & smooth peanut butter
celery & strawberry jam
cheese & brown sugar & fish paste
nettle leaf & salami
pilchard & crunchy peanut butter
sardine & spaghetti hotdog
fresh cream & raspberries in brown bread
Battered flinchered snodgian (DIY)

 

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